


Quarantine

by snekjoemrcookie



Category: The Good Doctor (TV 2017)
Genre: Breznick, CLAIRGAN, F/F, Gay, Isolation, Lesbian, Sharing a Bed, wlw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:07:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 12,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26922604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snekjoemrcookie/pseuds/snekjoemrcookie
Summary: An AU in which Morgan and Claire isolate together after both testing positive for coronavirus.
Relationships: Claire Browne & Morgan Reznick, Claire Browne/Morgan Reznick
Comments: 61
Kudos: 110





	1. Alone

**Author's Note:**

> hi everyone, welcome to my fic!! im pretty sure the writers are going to address coronavirus in season 4 so this is just like an AU. im not sure where this is going to end up but we shall see. also, just a warning, most of this is probably really medically inaccurate, bUt aNyWAy i hope u enjoy!!

Claire wakes up coughing. Her chest aches and she groans as she looks down at the mountain of used tissues by her bed. She fumbles around for her phone on her bedside table, before pulling it off the charger and unlocking it with her fingerprint. She types out a message to Doctor Lim saying that she’s sick and going to get tested for covid. Claire debates sending it for a few seconds, before reasoning that she, a) has been in contact with covid-positive patients and, b) has all the symptoms. She presses send and buries her face in the pillow. Her mind starts to wander and she can feel herself drifting back into sleep. 

When she eventually wakes up again, it’s 1pm and very sunny outside. Claire blinks the sleep out of her eyes and runs a hand through her curly hair. She pulls the covers off and stands up, trying not to step on the snotty tissues on the floor. The brown haired doctor walks over to her bedroom window and looks onto the street. It’s empty, apart from one of her neighbours checking their letterbox and two people wearing masks and holding full shopping bags. Claire walks over to her closet, trying not to let dizziness get the better of her. Deciding to get tested this afternoon, she pulls out a pair of white sneakers, boyfriend jeans, a white t-shirt, and a jacket.

The testing station is busy. Claire sits in line in her car for about 45 minutes before it’s her turn to be tested. The nurse asks her a few questions about her symptoms before Claire interrupts. "It’s okay, I’m a doctor. I’m a surgical resident at St. Bonaventure. I know the drill."  
The nurse nods. "Is it busy at St. Bonaventure? Are there many infected patients?"  
Claire thinks back to the last few weeks. They’ve had so many patients come in with coronavirus. She’s seen so many people die, much more than she would in a normal month. "It’s really busy. We get a lot of patients with covid-19."  
She takes a deep breath. "We’ve lost a lot of patients too."  
The nurse smiles sympathetically. 

The swab hurts her nose and makes her face sting. When Claire gets home, she crawls onto the couch and lies down. She wants to move to grab the TV remote but everything hurts and she’s finding it hard to breathe. She slides her phone out of her back pocket and even that simple act tires her out. Claire looks through her messages and texts Shaun to ask him about a patient.  
Twenty minutes later, he hasn’t replied and she’s bored. She scrolls down through her contacts until she finds the number she’s looking for, under R for Reznick. After thinking for a few minutes about what she wants to say she starts typing. "Hey Morgan, what’s up?" Claire shakes her head and deletes it. "Hi Morgan, how are my patients?" sounds better.  
She decides it sounds weird. She deletes it. Five minutes later, she still hasn’t sent anything. She rolls her eyes and sighs at herself. "It’s only Morgan. Just say something."  
Finally she settles on "Hey Morgan. If you aren’t busy, could you check on my patient Mr Bishop? I’m out sick today and I’d like to know how he is." She takes a deep breath and presses send. Honestly, why was that so hard? Claire doesn’t care what Morgan thinks. She thinks Morgan’s a bitch. Well, most of the time. Sometimes, she can be nice. Maybe, Claire thinks, Morgan actually does care, even if she has a funny way of showing it.

Morgan’s phone dings. She groans. Her face is still sore from having a swab stuck up her nose and she just can’t stop coughing. She wants to be left alone.  
After a minute of not moving, she stands up and walks across her living room, battling vertigo and fatigue, to pick up her phone. She smiles when she see the text is from Claire, and then immediately rearranges her features into a scowl. Why would she be happy to hear from Saint Claire? Claire is annoyingly nice to everyone. It drives Morgan crazy.  
She reads the message. "Hey Morgan. If you aren’t busy, could you check on my patient Mr Bishop? I’m out sick today and I’d like to know how he is."  
At first Morgan rolls her eyes. Of course Saint Claire is worried about her patients illnesses, instead of her own. But then she realises... Claire’s sick? Her mind starts racing, wondering how Claire is and if she’s okay. She frowns at herself. Claire’s probably fine. Why does she care this much, it’s pathetic. Morgan’s nose starts running and she sneezes. Abandoning her phone, she turns into the bathroom to find some toilet paper to blow her nose with, all the while wondering how to reply to Claire’s message without sounding too caring. 

Claire stares at her messages, waiting for either Morgan or Shaun to reply. She has a headache and her head feels like it’s being stabbed with sharp icicles. Her phone screen lights up. There’s a new message from Morgan. Her heart jumps but she tells herself it’s just because she’s nervous to hear about her patient.  
"Sorry, I don’t know. I’m home sick too. What’s going on with you?"  
Claire stops. Morgan’s sick? She texts back quickly. "I just got tested for corona but I’m fine. What about you? Are you okay?" 

Morgan stops what she’s doing when she reads that Claire might have coronavirus. She sits down, suddenly feeling even more tired than before. It’s funny because usually it irritates her when people shorten 'coronavirus' to 'corona', but when Claire says it, it just seems endearing. 

A few seconds later Morgan’s reply comes through. "I was tested too. We must have gotten it from that patient in the ICU last week."  
Claire sighs. She stands up and walks over to the window, staring out at the dawn sky. Clouds drift past slowly, the setting sun creating an orange hue around their tips. Light shines from the windows of the buildings, casting shadows onto the street. Silhouettes of people in their apartments can be seen eating dinner, watching TV, reading, talking. The street is quiet, eerily so.

Claire can’t help but feel like everything in the world is going wrong. 

They’re in the middle of a global pandemic. Claire herself is sick, and now so is Morgan. Claire can’t figure out why Morgan being ill is upsetting her so much but suddenly she feels trapped and she doesn’t want to be alone. Her apartment is too small and she’s bored, and scared, and people are sick and dying and nothing is right. So she texts Morgan back. She knows that she’ll probably regret sending the message later, but she’s having a moment of weakness right now and this really is what she wants, even if she’s too embarrassed to say it any other time.

The blonde doctor is hunched over her toilet, nausea coursing through her stomach. She hasn’t vomited yet but she feels like she’s about to. She retches but nothing comes up, probably because she’s hardly eaten anything all day.  
Morgan’s phone dings, pulling her attention away from the bottom of the toilet. "Do u want to come over? We can isolate together for a few nights. Or at least until the results of our tests come back."  
There’s a warm feeling in Morgan’s chest. She tells herself it’s just a side effect of the nausea.  
"Okay. I’ll be there in a few minutes."  
She stands up, slowly, to keep the nausea at bay. As she’s walking out of the bathroom, she catches a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She’s smiling.


	2. Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morgan comes over to Claire’s house - but she’s not feeling too well. Claire is there to look after her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi and welcome back to my fic i hope u all had a good week!!  
> at this point this fic only has 2 hits which is cool because 2 is better than none.
> 
> and if ur reading this i hope u enjoy the chapter :)

After packing a bag, changing her outfit, (she doesn’t know why she felt the need to change. She definitely doesn’t care about Claire Browne’s opinion) having a coughing fit, and putting on a mask, Morgan is ready to go to Claire’s. She gets in her car and turns on the radio. The news is on, and a serious-sounding news anchor delivers the news that the death toll in America has surpassed 200 thousand. Morgan sighs and pulls out of the car park.

The doorbell rings. Claire jumps up to answer it, and the sudden movement causes her to double over, coughing. She opens the door to see Morgan Reznick standing there, wearing a black mask, a long beige coat, and black jeans. Typical Morgan, Claire thinks. She’s pale and sick, but somehow still manages to look gorgeous.

"Hi. Uh, come in." Claire gestures for her to come inside. Her curly brown hair is in a rushed ponytail, which, for some reason, Morgan thinks is adorable. She looks around Claire’s apartment. She can see the kitchen and the living room at the end of the hall, and a few other doors before then. Everything’s tidy. Claire walks ahead of her and opens one of the doors. "This is the bathroom. There’s the shower, toilet, whatever." Claire flashes her an awkward smile. Morgan can’t help but smile back.  
Claire pushes open another one of the doors. The room behind it is obviously Claire’s bedroom. There’s a king-size bed in the middle of the room and clothes thrown all over the floor. It’s very messy, unlike the rest of the house. Claire blushes. "Sorry about the mess. Over lockdown it sort of... got like this."  
Morgan gives her a reassuring smile. "It’s fine, I get it."  
She doesn’t get it. Her whole apartment is always pristine and very organised. Most of the time she can’t stand mess, but she doesn’t mind Claire’s.  
Morgan shakes her head at herself. She’s acting weird around Claire and she still can’t figure out why. 

It’s starting to get dark so Claire starts thinking about making dinner. "Would you rather have risotto or mac and cheese?"  
Claire asks her, holding up two microwave-ready meals. "Usually I would actually cook something but-"  
She starts to explain but Morgan cuts her off. "It’s fine. You’re sick, you don’t have to cook. Plus, I really like mac and cheese."  
Claire narrows her eyes at her. "Morgan, you haven’t said a single rude thing since you’ve been here."  
She tilts her head at Morgan. "I realised that... I never thanked you. For after my mother died. You were trying to be there for me and I pushed you away."  
Morgan looks down, slightly embarrassed. She isn’t used to people really seeing her like this. Claire continues. "You really did help me."  
Morgan looks up. Their eyes meet and Morgan feels something that she swears she’s never felt before. She can’t quite put her finger on the emotion, but it’s making her heart beat faster and her chest feel tighter. She’s on edge but also comfortable at the same time and it feels electric.

Looking at Morgan now, the upset feeling that Claire had earlier is gone. Everything feels better. All of the bad things in the world aren’t as important anymore. It feels right. Eventually Morgan clears her throat and looks down at her lap, and the spell is broken. Claire turns around and starts preparing the dinner. "I’m going to go to the bathroom." Morgan says as she starts to walk away. "Okay." Claire replies uncertainly. After Morgan’s gone, the brown haired doctor stops what she’s doing. She sighs. What is she doing? Why did she invite Morgan over? And why did that one look make her feel so many feelings that she doesn’t even know how to name?  
She invited Morgan over because she didn’t want to be alone. But why Morgan Reznick specifically? She and Morgan are barely even friends.  
She doesn’t know why she wants to spend time with Morgan. But she does. And she’s glad Morgan’s here. 

Morgan thought dinner with Claire would be awkward, but it’s not. The conversation flows naturally and both of them seem at ease. Even when they aren’t talking, they’re sitting in comfortable silence. Until Morgan starts feeling nauseous again. The blonde woman gets up from the table and goes to put her bowl in the sink. "Are you okay?" Claire asks, her eyes filled with concern. "I’m fine," Morgan brushes off the question, ignoring Claire’s worry. Claire tilts her head at her. Morgan sighs. "I’m just a bit nauseous. It’s nothing."  
Claire gets up. "It doesn’t sound like nothing. Go sit down, I can do the dishes."  
Morgan starts to protest. "Claire, you’re sick too. It’s honestly no big deal."  
Claire is about to respond, but before she can, Morgan draws in a sharp breath and runs off to the bathroom. 

She’s bent over the toilet bowl, her face near the water. Claire races in just as she pukes. "Are you okay?"  
Morgan’s breath hitches in her throat and her eyes are filled with tears, but she nods her head. "Yeah I’m fine."  
Claire’s not sure what to do next. Morgan is doubled over, clearly trying to take deep breaths. She can’t stand seeing Morgan so sick and all she wants to do is take Morgan in her arms and hold her. The thought of that makes Claire feel more comfortable, for some reason, but just grabs some toilet paper and kneels down to hand it to Morgan. Uncertainly, she leans across and puts her arm around the taller woman’s shoulder in a sort of half-hug. Morgan looks like she might vomit again so Claire leans back a bit, before brushing her hair off her face, and holding it back as Morgan retches.  
Claire can’t help but notice how nice and soft her hair feels.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbh i prefer this chapter to the last one and it was easier to write which is a big plus
> 
> anyway thank u for reading and i will see u all next week!!


	3. Close

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire looks after Morgan while she’s sick.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope u like this chapter, it is probably my favourite so far, even tho its pretty short.   
> anyway pls enjoy and i will see u all next week!!

After twenty minutes of Morgan throwing up, Claire is still sitting with her, still holding her hair back. Of course Saint Claire would be so caring, she thinks, inwardly rolling her eyes, but deep down, she finds Claire’s kind nature endearing.  
Once she’s sure she’s stopped vomiting, she leans back, her back against the wall. Claire is next to her, their shoulders touching. "Do you feel better now?"  
She whispers, as if loud noises will make Morgan nauseous again.  
"Yeah. I feel okay." Morgan turns to look at Claire. She catches her eye, but looks away a few seconds too late. She never noticed how gorgeous Claire’s green eyes are. Then again, they’ve never been this close before. Morgan’s hand moves very slightly towards Claire’s, and Claire does the same. Morgan told herself that the reason why she felt the desire to be closer to the other doctor, was because she was sick, and exhausted, and needed someone there for her.  
But deep down, at the very back of her mind, in a place that she never let herself think about, she knew that wasn’t the reason at all.

Claire slid her fingers closer to Morgan’s. It doesn’t mean anything - she’s just being Saint Claire. Helping out a friend in need. Physical intimacy is good for comforting people, she thinks, nodding inwardly.  
But when their fingers touch, it’s like an electric shock. Claire’s heart speeds up, and she tries to focus on regulating her breathing, hoping that the other woman won’t notice. Just as her heart starts to slows down and her breathing goes back to normal, Morgan intertwines her fingers with Claire’s, and everything else just suddenly doesn’t matter. Claire gets a weird feeling in her chest, like her heart is aching, but not in a bad way. It feels more like her heart is full.

Morgan’s hand is warm and gentle, almost the opposite of how she imagined it would feel (not that she had imagined holding hands with Morgan, because she definitely hadn’t). Claire leans her head back against the wall.  
The two women are sitting side by side on the floor of Claire’s bathroom, their shoulders touching, their hands intertwined. They’re so close, Claire can almost imagine leaning in and tilting her head upwards, pressing her lips to Morgan’s...

Claire jumps. She sighs, before reasoning with herself that she doesn’t actually want to kiss Morgan, the human brain just has a habit of focusing about things you shouldn’t be thinking about at all. 

"Are you sure you’re okay now? Do you want some water?" Claire’s voice snaps Morgan back to reality.  
"Uh, yeah, I guess. It’s fine though, I can get it myself." Morgan stands up, letting go of Claire’s hand. "And, thanks for staying." Morgan flashes Claire a smile that gives her butterflies, and she can’t help but smile back at her adorable colleague (Morgan? Adorable? That can’t be right).  
Morgan walks out of the bathroom and once she’s gone, Claire stares at the place where Morgan used to be. It’s Morgan. Claire doesn’t care that much about Morgan. So why did it hurt so much when she let go of her hand?

Morgan takes a deep breath as she walks to the kitchen. She can feel the ghost of Claire’s touch on her fingers, like a phantom limb. Claire is just a colleague, she’s barely even a friend. And yet Morgan regrets letting go of her hand. She wishes she had stayed, sitting there on Claire’s bathroom floor.  
She looks through a few cabinets before finally finding the glasses.  
As the glass is filling up, Morgan looks out the window at the empty night city in front of her. They’re in the middle of a global pandemic, she herself is sick with a highly contagious and possibly fatal virus, and she’s quarantining at Claire’s place.  
The whole world is going insane.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry this chapter is kind of short, the next one will be a lot longer i promise.
> 
> ALSO so if u dont know, the season 4 trailer came out earlier this week and y’all i am SO SO EXCITED!!!! i cannot wait until november 2nd!!  
> however i am slightly dismayed that the only scene with both claire and morgan was them arguing?? that is annoying, BUT usually when characters fight, they make up at the end, so hopefully they will make up and give us some more breznick content? please?


	4. Stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morgan’s too tired to sleep on the couch - the only other alternative is to sleep in Claire’s bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry i know im a day late with this update but yesterday was halloween and i was busy.
> 
> anyway this is definitely my favourite chapter of this fic (so far) and i hope u all enjoy!!

Claire walks into the kitchen, where Morgan is leaning against the counter sipping her glass of water. She’s so composed, that if Claire hadn’t seen it, she would never have believed that ten minutes earlier the blonde doctor was in the bathroom, throwing up. But as she gets closer, she sees that Morgan is pale and shivering. All she wants to do is to reach out and hold her shaking hands. She grabs a handful of tissues, and blows her nose. She’s still short of breath and her lungs and heart feel exhausted but Morgan looks worse. Morgan turns around and puts her glass in the sink. "I feel kind of dizzy, I think I’ll just go to sleep now."  
She turns to Claire. Claire shrugs, trying to pretend like it’s not a big deal to her. "Okay, goodnight."

Morgan takes a few shaky steps towards the couch, before stumbling slightly. Claire instinctively moves towards her, to catch her if she needs. She regains her composure, but still looks unsteady on her feet. Claire puts her arm around Morgan, expecting her to push her away and tell her that she’s fine.  
But she doesn’t. She leans into Claire, putting some of her weight on her shoulder. It breaks Claire’s heart just a little to see the pain written all over the blonde’s face.  
"You can sleep in my bed if you want. It’s more comfortable and I can just sleep on the couch."  
Morgan starts to protest. "No, it’s fine. The couch isn’t that bad, and I’m okay."  
Claire rolls her eyes. "Morgan. Why do you have to be so stubborn about everything? You’re sick. Just accept the help."  
Morgan is silent for a minute, before nodding slightly. 

Morgan slips her pyjama top over her head and glares at herself in the mirror. Why did she have to throw up in front of Claire? The other woman probably thinks she’s gross now. She looks close at her reflection. Her blonde hair is kind of greasy and her face looks washed out. She looks exhausted, and she feels it too. Morgan’s vision blurs and her reflection fades out of view. She feels faint, and she really doesn’t want to pass out in Claire’s bathroom, so she walks unsteadily to the bedroom, where the brunette is standing in her pyjamas. Claire is only wearing a white singlet and light blue sweatpants, and Morgan is kind of staring. She knows she’s being creepy and she doesn’t know why, but she also doesn’t want to look away. The pounding in her head worsens, and Morgan suddenly remembers that she’s sick, and so is Claire. They’re in quarantine, it’s not like they’re on a date. 

(Morgan can’t understand why a part of her likes the idea of that so much).

She sits down on the edge of the bed, and almost falls off, except that Claire is by her side immediately, holding her up, holding her together. Claire’s arms are around her, their noses almost touching. Morgan can feel her heart rate speeding up. She didn’t know that was a symptom of coronavirus, but it must be... right?  
Morgan isn’t dizzy anymore but her head is still spinning.

Claire is so close to Morgan, everything else kind of melts away. The global pandemic, her own illness, nothing else even matters anymore.  
After what feels like an eternity, but was probably only a minute, Morgan looks down at her lap, and Claire pulls away. "Thanks. I’m okay now." Morgan says softly, fidgeting with her hands.  
Claire realises that she’s never really seen the other woman be vulnerable like this. Actually she doubts Morgan has ever been vulnerable in front of anyone, ever. Morgan’s like a mystery to Claire. She doesn’t know anything about her, but she wants to. She wants to know everything about Morgan. She wants to be a part of her life. It’s intriguing.

Morgan glances up at Claire before looking away again quickly. "I’m not feeling great. I think I’ll just go to sleep now."  
She stands up, and kind of stumbles the few steps to the top of the bed. Claire stands up too. "Do you want anything? Water, blankets, anything."  
Morgan shrugs. "Oh, maybe a bowl."  
The brunette stares at her blankly.  
"Unless you want me to throw up on your bed," Morgan smirks. Claire rolls her eyes and walks out to grab a bowl. Morgan sits on the edge of Claire’s bed. It’s comfortable.  
Morgan looks around the bedroom, trying to see everything. There’s a photo on a shelf that catches her eye. She looks a bit closer, and realises it’s a photo of Claire, Shaun, Park, and her. She’s holding a cake, while Claire is blowing out the candles. Park is standing near, looking enthusiastic, while Shaun looks distracted.  
They all look happy. 

Morgan remembers when it was taken. Andrews had taken it, when none of them were looking. It was Claire’s birthday, and she had stayed up late the night before to bake a cake for her, after Shaun had mentioned the date in passing. She told everyone it was a store-bought cake, but she could tell that Park didn’t really believe her. Claire seemed really happy when she had seen it. The way she smiled, a look of pure joy, was something that Morgan had never forgotten. The fact that Claire kept the photo next to her bed gave Morgan a warm feeling in her chest, that made her heart beat slightly faster.

Claire walks back in holding a bowl. Morgan turns to look at her. "Thanks," she says, taking the bowl and putting it down next to the bed. "You look pale," Claire says. "I’m going to take your temperature," she walks over to Morgan until she’s standing right in front of her, their knees almost touching. Morgan suddenly realises how hot and uncomfortable she feels. Claire puts her hand on Morgan’s forehead and her cool touch feels so refreshing on Morgan’s feverish skin. "You’re burning up," the brunette says, worried. She moves her hand down from Morgan’s forehead, slowly caressing her face.  
Now Claire’s hands are soothing Morgan in a way that’s unrelated to her fever. "You look tired. You should sleep." Claire murmurs. "Mmmm," Morgan agrees passively. She can barely think at this stage. "Come on," the brunette says gently, pulling the duvet back so that Morgan can lie down. She slides into bed and Claire pulls the blankets back up over her. She is so tired, she can barely move her eyes. Morgan can feel herself drifting into that hazy half-wake, half-sleep phase. She’s not aware of much but she could swear she feels Claire place a soft kiss on her forehead, her hand gently stroking her hair. Then she hears Claire’s footsteps walking away. "Stay," Morgan says faintly. She knows it’s weird to ask Claire that, but she feels so sick and she wants her there. She needs her there. 

There’s a pause, and Morgan isn’t sure if Claire’s still there or not. 

Then she feels Claire’s warm body slide in next to hers, her fingers brushing the hair out of her face. Their legs are intertwined under the covers, and Claire is holding Morgan. Claire’s touch soothes her feverish skin and the pounding pain in her head. The two woman are wrapped around each other, as Morgan slowly falls into unconsciousness.

Claire’s heart is aching. For Morgan to be so submissive, she must feel really unwell. All she wants to do is hold her, and comfort her. Claire tells herself to just leave, just let the sick woman sleep. But she can’t stop herself. She strokes Morgan’s soft blonde hair, and kisses her hot forehead. It takes all of her willpower to stand up and walk away, leaving Morgan on her own.  
But then she hears a quiet, almost hoarse voice, asking her to stay. She tells herself that she’s helping her friend, giving her what she needs. But deep down, all Claire wants is to be closer to Morgan. She crawls under the duvet and wraps her arms around Morgan, feeling the heat coming off her burning skin.  
Morgan’s breathing starts to slow, and Claire follows her into sleep not long after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the season 4 premiere is in two days and im SO FRICKIN EXCITED!!!  
> there’s a lot to unpack from the season 3 finale, plus coronavirus, so im interested to see how it goes.  
> also i loved it in 3x09 when they showed that photo in claire’s room. i really like the friendship between the four residents so i hope we get to see more of that in season 4 too!!


	5. The Morning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay but can we talk about the season premiere?? i was so excited for it and tbh i was NOT disappointed. i have seen some people saying that coronavirus was the last thing they wanted to see on their tv, and i can understand that, like i also found it slightly depressing to hear more about covid BUT we are living in a global pandemic. this is a reality for a lot of people and it would feel wrong for the show not to address it, so im glad they did.  
> but also i wish morgan got more screen time, i swear she wasnt in that many scenes.
> 
> BUT ANYWAY i hope u guys enjoy the chapter :)

Morgan is the first to wake up the next morning. Her eyes are still closed, sticky with sleep, as she quickly recalls the events of the previous day. She’s sick, and so is Claire, who invited her over and looked after her as she threw up in her toilet. Morgan blinks open her eyes, as she realises that the soft sheets under her and the warm, heavy duvet wrapped around her are Claire’s. She is in Claire’s bed. 

With Claire.

Morgan can feel Claire’s chest slowly rising and falling. She glances over at the other woman, her mind racing. Claire’s soft curls are messy, spread out across the pillow, and her face looks peaceful. Morgan is thirsty, and she wants to get up and get a glass of water, but more than that, she doesn’t want to disturb her adorable colleague. 

'Colleague' doesn’t seem right. They’re closer than that. After all, they did sleep in the same bed. But 'friend' doesn’t really seem to describe what they are either.  
(And calling Claire 'adorable'? Did Morgan seriously just think that?)

Morgan glances over to the window. Faint dusky sunlight is streaming in, diminished by the curtains, but still bright enough to make her squint. It’s still quite early in the morning, and Morgan wants to go back to sleep, but now that she’s more conscious, she is wary of being so vulnerable in front of someone else. No matter how she feels, she always makes sure to act like she doesn’t care about anything or anyone. Something like sleeping next to someone leaves you defenceless, and Morgan doesn’t like that. In previous relationships, it’s taken her a while to feel comfortable sleeping in the same bed as her partner. But sleeping next to Claire, their bodies still tangled up under the duvet, Morgan doesn’t feel scared or uncomfortable. She feels... safe, and warm, and calm. She moves closer to Claire and closes her eyes again. 

A few hours later, Claire wakes up to a sleeping Morgan, and a room full of bright midday light. She blinks a few times until her eyes come into focus. Morgan is lying next to her, her arm around Claire’s back. Claire is still holding Morgan, her fingers tangled up in her long blonde hair. Morgan’s face is still pale and she still looks ill, but she looks relaxed in her sleep. Claire thinks she’s beautiful. (Beautiful? Really, Claire? No.)  
She quickly shakes the thought out of her head, but the awkward feeling still remains. The clock next to the bed reads 1:12pm. Claire needs to go to the toilet, so she reluctantly untangles herself from Morgan, and gently slides off the bed, trying her best not to disturb her. 

When Claire walks back into the room, Morgan is propped up on her elbows, awake. "I’m so sorry, did I wake you?" Claire kicks herself internally, realising that maybe she could have been a bit quieter. But Morgan just shakes her head. "No, you’re fine, I would have woken up anyway."  
Morgan rubs her eyes, looking sleepy. God, she’s cute, Claire thinks involuntarily. Claire frowns inwardly at herself. Seriously, what is wrong with her?  
"How are you feeling? Still not good?"  
Morgan shrugs. "Better. I don’t feel like I’m about to throw up on your carpet."  
The last sentence was accompanied by Morgan’s cocky, charming smile. Claire feels herself smiling back.  
"How do you feel?" Morgan’s features rearrange into a frown. "You’re sick too."  
Claire strolls back over to her side of the bed, and sits down, pulling the covers up over her legs. "A bit worse than yesterday, but I’ll live." She glances down at Morgan, who looks concerned. 

"A bit worse than yesterday, but I’ll live." Claire says it nonchalantly, but it worries Morgan. She knows Claire isn’t dying or anything, but it concerns her to think that Claire might be in pain. (She doesn’t usually feel like this about her sick patients, so she’s not sure why Claire’s illness matters so much more). A strand of hair falls across Claire’s face, and before she can stop herself, Morgan reaches out and gently brushes it away. 

Maybe she’s just imagining things, but it feels like Claire leans slightly into her touch. 

Morgan’s phone rings, interrupting the short-lived moment between them.  
"Sorry, I’ll get that," Morgan mumbles, pulling away from Claire, and climbing out of bed to find her phone, still in the pocket of her jeans. She picks it up, accepting the call. "Hello?"  
"Hey, you weren’t at work yesterday."  
Alex’s voice comes through the phone, and Morgan can hear people talking in the background. "Yeah, I’m sick."  
"Really?" Alex sounds worried and Morgan can imagine him frowning into his phone.  
"Yeah. Why, do you miss me?"  
Morgan grins her trademark cocky grin. She glances over at Claire, who is smiling softly at her.  
"Haha, no, I just wanted to see where you were. We’re understaffed, and Claire’s not here either."  
"Yeah."  
"I’m going to go get a drink of water," Claire mouths at her, as she walks away. Morgan nods at her, flashing her a small smile. She pauses, debating whether or not to Alex him that they both have covid.  
"I’m infected, actually. With coronavirus. And so is Claire."  
There’s an shocked silence on the other end of the phone.  
"Are you joking?"  
"No, I’m deadly serious."  
Alex draws in a sharp breath. "Are you okay?"  
Morgan rolls her eyes. "Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t worry, I’m not dying or anything."  
"Fair point. Is Claire okay?"  
"Yeah, she’s good too."  
"How do you know?"  
Morgan hesitates. "Uh... we’re isolating together."  
"Wait, for real? I didn’t know you guys were that close. I barely even thought you were friends."  
"I mean, we aren’t really. I guess we kind of are. But we aren’t like... friends friends."  
Alex chuckles. "Then what kind of friends are you?"  
Morgan tries to come up with a response he’ll be satisfied with, but he interrupts her train of thought.  
"I’m at work and I got to go. Patient emergency. Bye, hope you and Claire are okay."  
"Bye, Park."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay one more thing about the season premiere is that i am slightly pressed about the fact that claire and morgans only scene together was them kind of fighting. hopefully there is some more breznick in the next episode (which i am very excited for).
> 
> overall i did really like the season premiere and it was also just really cool to get to see a new episode. 
> 
> i hope u all enjoyed it too and i hope u have a good week!!


	6. Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im not even sure how to name my chapters, at this point im just naming them random words.
> 
> also i really enjoyed the recent episode tbh, it felt like a perfect sequel to the last one. i liked the happy ending, im glad park is staying, i cried when petringa died 🥺🥺 but i really liked seeing morgan care for her. it was kind of weird how melendez was there as like a ghost but i think the ending was good. 
> 
> all in all, a good episode, and im looking forward to the next one!!

She ends the call and sits down. Claire pops her head around the door. "Hey. Do you want breakfast? Because I have lots of options if you want, but it’s fine if you don’t. If you feel sick, you don’t have to eat anything."  
Morgan blinks, trying to think of what she wants. "No I’m fine, thanks. I’m still kind of nauseous."  
Claire nods. "Same. And it’s kind of late for breakfast anyway. It’s more like lunch now."  
Morgan frowns. "You’re nauseous?"  
"A little bit," Claire shrugs. Seeing the anxious look on Morgan’s face, she backtracks. "I’m just not that hungry."  
Morgan nods nonchalantly. "Okay."  
Claire yawns. Morgan smirks. "Are you seriously tired? We just woke up and it’s like 12 o’clock."  
Claire looks at her, the suggestion of a smile spreading across her face. "Give me a break, I’m sick. Tell me you aren’t tired too."  
Morgan shrugs, making a meh face.  
Claire stares pointedly at her. Morgan sighs. "I’m exhausted."  
Claire laughs. Morgan looks down, trying to keep the smile off her face. "Do you want to watch a movie or something?"  
Claire suggests it because she’s bored, but she really doesn’t feel well and she can see Morgan doesn’t either.

That’s how they end up on the couch watching Titanic. Morgan and Claire are sitting close to each other, their legs touching. On the TV, Rose climbs out of the lifeboat, and jumps back onto the Titanic. "That was the worst thing she could have done." Morgan comments. "She was in a lifeboat and she jumped back onto a sinking ship? Is she serious?"  
Claire chuckles. "It’s because they were so in love. Come on, even you have to admit, it’s romantic."  
Morgan shrugs. "It would be, except that he would be alive if she hadn’t gone back. If she had stayed on the lifeboat, when the boat sank Jack could have had that floating door to himself. They both could have lived."  
Claire pauses, before shaking her head. "No way, that wouldn’t have worked. She had to go back to release him from the handcuffs. She saved him."  
"Yeah, but that was before this. She saved him and then she got on the lifeboat and then she jumped off again. I’m just saying, she shouldn’t have."  
Claire blinks. She thinks silently for a second, while Morgan just grins at her triumphantly.  
"Shut up, you’re ruining the movie," Claire glares jokingly up at her, trying to look annoyed, but failing. A reluctant smile spreads across her face. Morgan’s smile widens. Claire presses play on the remote and they go back to watching the movie. Claire yawns. Her vision is hazy with fatigue. "I’m kind of tired," she comments to Morgan, who looks down at her. "You can sleep if you want," Morgan shrugs. Claire’s eyes are sticky and she’s having trouble keeping her eyes open. Her thoughts get blurrier and blurrier in her head, until she almost can’t hear them anymore. Everything goes black.

Claire, dead to the world in her sleep, drops her head onto Morgan’s shoulder. Morgan can’t help but smile as Claire buries her face into Morgan’s shirt. The movie keeps playing and Morgan watches the rest of it, as Claire sleeps cuddled up against her. 

The Titanic is sinking on the TV screen. Claire sighs in her sleep and moves her shoulders, nestling in even closer to Morgan. Morgan puts her arms around Claire, just to make sure she won’t fall off the couch. As she listens to Claire breathe slowly, Morgan feels something in her heart that she hadn’t felt about anyone since... maybe never. She pushes it to one side, telling herself that it’s just Claire, and there’s no way she could feel that way about her. 

But in the back of her mind, she knows she already does. She’s always liked Claire, maybe from the first moment they met. But Claire’s definitely straight, and definitely not interested in her, so Morgan ignores the feeling; the same way she has since she realised she might feel this way. "It doesn’t matter anyway," she tells herself, as she smiles sadly at the other doctor, asleep on her shoulder. "It’ll never happen. Just forget about it."  
She takes a deep breath and turns back to the TV, all romantic thoughts of Claire (almost) forgotten.

As Claire wakes up, she slowly becomes aware of her surroundings. Sad music is playing on the TV. Her body is pressed up against Morgan’s, and the height difference between the two woman is perfect so that Claire’s head can rest comfortably on Morgan’s shoulder. Morgan’s arm is around her back, and Claire thinks she never wants to move. Right here, in this hazy half-wake, half-sleep, with Morgan so close, and the calm, sunny day outside the window, she doesn’t care about anything else. 

After several minutes of pretending she was still asleep, Claire slowly sits up, making sure not to move too fast so Morgan doesn’t move away. Morgan turns to look at her. "Hey," she says calmly. "Hey," Claire yawns. "What part are we up to in the movie?"  
Morgan rolls her eyes. "The Titanic is still sinking. It’s about to split in half."  
"Nooo, but this is the sad bit," Claire groans. "It makes me cry every time."  
Morgan chuckles. "Of course it does, Saint Claire," she jokes, with a teasing smile.  
Claire sighs. "Stop calling me Saint Claire."  
Morgan slips her a sly smile. Claire tries to maintain her exasperated facade, but fails. 

Damn Morgan Reznick and that endearing smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is probably kind of inaccurate, its been a while since i saw titanic and this is just what i remember of it. and i stand by the statement that rose should have stayed on that lifeboat.
> 
> also i’ve been kind of busy recently and i have a school camp thing coming up so im not sure if i will have a finished chapter to post next week but i will try my best :D


	7. Mysteries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ah sorry for missing an update but i had two school camps in the last two weeks and i didnt have time to finish the chapter but here it finally is so i hope u enjoy :)

Jack tells Rose to take the door for herself. Claire expects Morgan to make some cynical comment about how they could both have fit on there, or how they were being overdramatic because they had only known each other for a few days. She looks over at Morgan, who has tears streaming down her cheeks, her eyes focused on the TV. Claire grins. She never thought of Morgan as the type of person who would cry at the end of Titanic. 

Morgan’s like an enigma. Sometimes it seems like her whole bitchy act is just a facade, and under it all she’s a caring and genuine person. But other times, she’s just selfish. Claire wants to know her, everything about her. She’s a mystery that Claire wants so badly to solve.

Claire doesn’t say any of that though. She just chuckles. Morgan laughs awkwardly, wiping her face. "I didn’t peg you for a romantic," Claire grins. "I’m not," Morgan retorts, putting up her tough front again. "It’s sweet." Claire smiles at her gently. Morgan glances back in astonishment. Nobody has ever called her sweet before. Honestly, Morgan thinks, whenever anyone compliments her she has a hard time believing them. She’s never believed anything good about herself. But now, looking at Claire’s face, her kind, genuine face, she almost buys it. 

Because to Morgan, a compliment from Claire is worth 10 times a compliment from anyone else.

Claire turns back to the movie. When Jack dies she glances at Morgan, who has tears spilling down her face again. Morgan catches her looking and smirks, wiping her nose. Claire is dismayed to find herself thinking about how adorable Morgan is, but she still rests her head on Morgan’s shoulder and slips her hands into hers.

They stay that way until the very end of the credits, neither of them wanting to move away. 

Claire is the first one to pull away.  
"I’m kind of hungry. Do you want any food or anything?"  
Morgan shrugs. "I’ll just make myself a cup of tea, if you have any."  
Claire nods. "Yeah, I have tea. I can make it for you, it’s not a problem."  
"Claire. I can make my own tea."  
Claire rolls her eyes, trying to stifle a grin. "Okay, fine. Suit yourself."

Morgan smiles back at Claire, before standing up and following her into the kitchen.  
"Where do you keep your mugs?" Morgan looks back at Claire, who points to a cupboard just above her head. "Thanks," Morgan murmurs, as she reaches up to grab one.  
"The teabags and the sugar and stuff are in those jars over there," Claire nods over at the corner of the kitchen. She flicks the switch on the kettle, which starts to boil. Claire goes to get a mug for herself, but Morgan is closer, and taller, so she grabs one and passes it to Claire wordlessly.  
Claire can’t help but think that the pair are moving around the kitchen in unison, like a well oiled machine. 

Like a couple, she thinks. 

She wishes.

Claire immediately blocks the thought out of her mind, consciously trying her best not to think about it. Her brain is just being stupid. That can’t be right. If Claire liked Morgan like that, she would know.

Wouldn’t she?

The kettle whistles, and Morgan walks over to pick it up. Claire’s brain is almost seeing things in slow motion. How did she never notice how tall and gorgeous Morgan was? She always knew Morgan was attractive, but she had never really payed attention to it. Her electric blue eyes and charmingly arrogant smile had always interested Claire, but not like this. 

And then Claire realises.

She’s felt this way for a while.  
Maybe that’s why she was so worried when Morgan told her she had coronavirus. Maybe that’s why she invited her over. Maybe that’s why she was glad last night when Morgan asked her to stay. 

Morgan’s voice disrupts her thoughts. "Do you put sugar in your tea?"  
Claire frowns, shaking her head at herself. "Uh... I- what?" She stammers, and she knows she’s being so awkward but she doesn’t know how to talk to her. How can she act casual when she just realised she has feelings for Morgan Reznick? The gorgeous, charismatic, and somewhat apathetic Morgan Reznick, who is currently standing right in front of her, asking her about tea. Claire doesn’t know what to do with her feelings, especially since Morgan is probably straight. She’s talked about having boyfriends and never mentioned girlfriends.  
But, Claire thinks wishfully, she’s hasn’t ever specifically stated her sexuality.

But the other thing on Claire’s mind is the fact that she herself is straight. She’s never dated a girl before. She’s never identified as anything but straight. How can she have feelings for a woman? 

What if she’s bi?

Claire’s mind is racing. She’s definitely not gay. She would know if she were gay. She’s almost 30 years old, how could she not know she liked women? She’d been attracted to women before, but she had always assumed it was thanks to the objectification of women in media. She had never actually considered the possibly that maybe she really actually was attracted to them. 

And now she’s really actually attracted to Morgan Reznick. 

She’s totally screwed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes i did just write about how i realised i was bi and what about it?
> 
> also i really liked the two recent episodes if u want my opinion:  
> [spoiler alert by the way]  
> 4x03 kind of annoyed me tbh bc the whole thing felt like morgan being annoying and claire being short with her and the end was,,, unsatisfying ??  
> overall it was good but in terms of their relationship it did not give me hope BUT i really enjoyed the recent episode. it is definitely my favourite of season 4 so far. i liked the patient storylines and it was cool to see shaun being a mentor, plus it felt like they payed more attention to morgan and the fact that shes only being annoying bc shes taking the loss of her career hard. i also loved seeing her at home like i swear we’ve only seen her house once?? plus i love her and parks relationship. them insulting each other at the end was exactly like a conversation between me and my brother. and im totally here for claire and audreys friendship.  
> anyway im super excited for the next episode and i really hope they address morgans issues more bc it feels like theyre building up to something there?? and hopefully claire can help her and be a part of that too. also bc at the end when she was telling the residents about how its good to have differing opinions and u have to work out ur baggage and stuff idk it just felt like it could relate a lot to claire and morgans relationship too.


	8. Calm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i missed last weeks update and on top of that this chapter is a day late!! i was a bit busy and didn’t have time to finish writing but its here now and hopefully i will be more prepared in future (probably not but we can hope).

Morgan impatiently interrupts her gay panic. "Claire!! Do you want sugar?"   
Claire just stares at her blankly.   
"In your tea?" Morgan clarifies. Claire nods. "Oh yeah, two teaspoons. Please."   
She rethinks over everything she’s realised in the past three minutes. She’s gay. And she likes Morgan. 

Claire sighs and pushes it out of her mind. She can think about it later, but while she and Morgan are isolating together in her small apartment, she has to ignore her increasingly strong feelings for the other woman. So when Morgan hands her the mug full of hot, freshly-made tea, Claire pushes aside the spark of electricity that passes through her hand where their fingers touch. And when Morgan’s eyes flit up to meet Claire’s, she takes no notice of the longing ache in her chest. And when a small smile makes its away across Morgan’s face, she ignores the way her heart beats faster, and harder.

"Thanks," Claire murmurs, looking purposefully away from Morgan.   
Morgan coughs and she looks back around, frowning.   
"Are you okay?" Claire asks worriedly. Morgan is doubled over, coughing, but she manages to wave her hand slightly, in a gesture that Claire takes to mean 'calm down'. 

After another coughing fit, Morgan eventually tells Claire she’s fine. But her voice is hoarse, and she sounds out of breath. "Are you having trouble breathing? Any chest pain?" Claire frets.   
"Claire," Morgan takes a slow breath, "I’m fine. You don’t have to worry."  
Claire takes a step back. "Okay," she murmurs, unconvinced.

Morgan’s not fine. Every breath she takes is punctuated with pain. She can hear herself wheezing whenever she inhales. But she doesn’t want to worry Claire. Sweet, kind Claire who would drop everything to help Morgan if she knew she was really struggling to get a proper breath. So she picks up her tea and sits back down on the couch, and Claire comes and sits down next to her not long after. Flicking her curly brown hair over her shoulder, she slips Morgan a soft smile that only adds to Morgan’s inability to breathe properly. "Seriously Morgan," her playful green eyes turn serious. "I want to know if you’re not okay. I want to know how you feel, I want to be able to help." 

And then she looks at Morgan in such a manner that it makes Morgan’s heart stutter in a way coronavirus never could.

"And even if I can’t help... I want to be able to be there. For you." Claire’s eyes flick down and she stares at her hands, fidgeting in her lap. 

"Difficulty breathing and chest pain."  
Morgan’s hoarse voice breaks the silence between them. "The symptoms I’m experiencing right now," she clarifies when Claire looks up, frowning, to meet her gaze. "I don’t need to go to the hospital though. I’m sure I’ll feel better soon, and it’s not that bad anyway," Morgan shrugs. Claire narrows her eyes at her, and Morgan sits up straighter and holds her head higher, as if daring Claire to argue with her. 

Claire sighs. She’s worried about Morgan. Those symptoms are concerning and she should at least get checked out at the hospital. They had both seen the way this virus could turn on patients. Coronavirus is a brutal attacker. People can be fine one minute, and dead the next.

But she knows Morgan won’t go in, and she knows better than to try and convince her. The best they can do is compromise.  
"Okay," Claire accepts. "But if you still feel like this tomorrow, I’m driving you to the hospital myself. No arguments."  
Morgan raises one eyebrow. Claire keeps her face serious, trying to hold her ground. Morgan exhales tiredly. "Fine."

Morgan won’t say it, but if she still feels like this tomorrow, she wants Claire to take her to the hospital. Behind her tough, unemotional front, she knows she’s not invincible, and her symptoms are bad. At the hospital, she had several patients who had been admitted for less severe symptoms than hers, and died within the week. But the voice inside her mind is still telling her to suck it up and stop being dramatic. So in front of Claire, she pretends to be reluctant to agree. 

At least that’s a small victory for the voice in her head.

Claire relaxes, clearly relieved by Morgan’s agreement. Deep down, Morgan is relieved too. Knowing that Claire will do her best to not let her die calms her. 

Morgan is obviously still in pain. Claire can see the effort she has to put into taking a single, shallow breath. She knows if she reaches out, it would only push Morgan away and make her defensive. But seeing the blonde struggling makes her heart ache, and she has to do something, anything that might make Morgan feel a little bit less alone.   
So she wraps her arms around Morgan’s shoulders and pulls her close. After getting over the initial shock, Morgan wraps her arms around Claire and grips her tightly. Claire can hear Morgan wheezing excruciatingly when she inhales, her breath rattling in her chest. She holds Morgan closer, wanting to do something to make the other woman feel better. Claire shuts her eyes, her heart breaking more and more with every painful breath she hears Morgan take.   
Claire knows she’s powerless to help.  
And maybe that’s the worst part.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this chapter is kind of short, the next one will hopefully be a kind of climax to this whole story. there will probably only be like two or three chapters left of this fic anyway hehehe :)  
> anyway have a good week and (hopefully) i will see u all next week with a new chapter!!


	9. Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morgan’s condition deteriorates. Claire worries about her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi everyone :D  
> i was going to write a christmas-themed breznick one shot but i probably wont have time (and i dont have any ideas as to what to write) so that probably wont happen hehe but maybe i will get one done in time for new years instead :D

That night, they sleep in the same bed again. Morgan would have offered to sleep on the couch, but her breathing hadn’t gotten any better and, just in case, she didn’t want to be alone.

She really means she didn’t want to die alone.

Morgan knows if she had offered, Claire would have insisted she take the bed again.   
And Claire knows that if she had offered to sleep on the couch, Morgan would probably have asked her to stay again. This way, they’re just saving time.

Claire turns off the light and slips into bed next to Morgan. She turns over so she’s facing the wall, and shuts her eyes. After adjusting the pillow a few times, she’s asleep within a few minutes.

Morgan hears it when Claire’s breathing evens out. She sighs and turns over again. She’s exhausted, and all she wants to do is sleep, but the persistent pain in her chest is making it hard. She takes deep breaths, trying to relax enough to fall into sleep but her mind won’t shut off. She’s not thinking about anything specific, but her brain is full of random half-finished thoughts and it feels messy.   
Morgan is suddenly so hot, it feels like she’s boiling, so she throws off the blankets and turns over again.   
But a few seconds later, she’s freezing cold, so she drags the duvet back up. 

The tightness in Morgan’s chest is still making it hard to get a proper breath in, and although she’s trying hard not to panic, her anxiety is growing and making it even more difficult to relax.   
She turns over again, in an attempt to get comfortable, and catches a glimpse of Claire. God, she’s so beautiful, Morgan thinks. Frowning at herself, she tries to block out all thoughts of Claire and how beautiful she is. The more she lets herself think about Claire, the more she’ll fall for her, is her logic.   
(But if she’s being honest with herself, she knows she’s already fallen hard. She’s so far in love with Claire, it’s pathetic.)

Morgan dismisses her feelings again. It’s stupid, and unrealistic. So instead, she tries to count backwards from 200 in French. She gets to 178 before her mind starts to wander again. She sighs and turns over again. Next to her, Claire stirs in her sleep. Morgan freezes. The last thing she wants is to wake Claire up. Claire’s sick and needs her sleep too. 

Claire yawns. She looks around the room, expecting it to be morning, or at least later than it is. She’s surprised to see the clock read 11pm; only about one hour after she went to sleep. She glances over to Morgan, to see if she’s asleep. She’s not. "Hey," Claire whispers quietly. Morgan looks back at her, her expression softening. "Hey."  
"Have you been awake this whole time, or did you just wake up?"  
Morgan shrugs. Claire sighs and looks at Morgan, tired of her being so closed off. Morgan rolls her eyes. "I couldn’t sleep."  
Claire’s exasperation fades. "Are you okay? Is your breathing worse?"  
"No, it’s fine, I’m fine." Morgan reassures her. 

Claire lets out a breath she had been holding. "Come here," she murmurs and then she’s holding Morgan, and they’re tangled up in each other, and they’re so close that Claire can feel Morgan’s heart beating. They stay like that until Morgan falls asleep. After Claire hears Morgan’s painful breathing slow, she stops trying to stay awake and lets herself rest too.

Claire wakes up to see Morgan slip out of the room. It’s still dark outside. She glances at the clock on her bedside table, squinting through still half-asleep eyes. 2:34am. She groans, annoyed at her sleep being interrupted, but also curious as to why Morgan’s up. 

The sound of vomiting answers that question. Claire jumps out of bed, and jogs to the bathroom.   
Morgan is slumped against the wall next to the toilet. She’s pale and looks lifeless, like at any moment she could fall asleep and never wake up.   
"Morgan," Claire murmurs. The blonde stirs slightly, lifting her chin to look at Claire. "Hey."   
Her breath is coming in gasps and her voice is hoarse. Claire sits next to her, and pulls her hair away from her face, like she did the first day Morgan came over. But they both know it’s worse than then. Her condition has deteriorated a lot since then. 

"I think we should go to the hospital," Claire whispers. Morgan slowly moves her head to look at her. "Yeah," she murmurs weakly. 

That takes Claire kind of by surprise. Morgan has never done anything Claire’s told her to without a fight. She chokes back the tears she can feel welling up.   
If Morgan’s too sick to argue, this must be really bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that feeling of not being able to sleep is one i know all too well 🙄
> 
> also i probably wont post a new chapter next week bc yk christmas   
> and i will probably be pretty busy so im not sure if i will be able to post the week after that either :)
> 
> so anyway, merry christmas and happy new year everyone :D


	10. Consciousness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry i have missed way more updates than i meant to, i was on holiday and kept getting distracted and stuff but im back now and i promise i havent forgotten about this fic hehehe
> 
> also i just wanted to say i really enjoyed the recent episodes. i loved the lim-centric episode, it was so good and audreys one of my favourite characters. i hope she feels better soon but seriously it was so good and christinas acting was amazing.  
> and can we talk about how in 4x07 claire and morgan were LITERALLY BEING BESTIES AND I LOVED IT SO MUCH this is the content i live for, seriously it was adorable.
> 
> anyways this chapter is kind of short and pathetic sorry but i wanted to get it finished in time to post today :)

Morgan is quiet on the way to the hospital. Claire sits at the wheel, looking at the road, occasionally glancing over to see how she is. Morgan’s head is resting against the window, and she’s staring out the window into the dark empty night, her eyes unfocused. "Hey," Claire murmurs. "You okay?"  
Morgan looks up and wearily brings herself to give Claire a small smile. "I’m fine."  
"Okay." Claire says, unconvinced. "We’re almost there."  
Morgan tiredly leans her head against the car window again. Claire pushes her foot against the accelerator harder, trying to get them there as soon as possible.

When they pull up to the hospital carpark, Morgan is barely conscious. "Morgan," Claire murmurs as she puts her hand on Morgan’s shoulder gently. A strand of hair has fallen across Morgan’s face, which Claire brushes back gently. Morgan slowly blinks open her eyes. "Are we here?"  
Her voice is faint and she’s pale. Like a ghost, Claire thinks. "Yeah," she whispers back softly. "We’re almost in, okay? You just have to walk a few steps to the elevator. It’ll be okay, but you have to wake up now." 

Morgan rubs her eyes, puts on her mask, and opens the car door. Claire jumps out of the car and walks quickly to Morgan’s side to help her out. They walk through the carpark, into the elevator, Claire’s arm around Morgan, supporting her. 

The elevator doors open on the first floor and suddenly the quiet, calm spell of the elevator is broken by the chaos and anarchy outside. Doctors and nurses are running around, there’s several patients in every room, and everyone is wearing PPE. 

They walk into the ER and Claire helps Morgan into a bed.

She practically collapses onto the bed, her body going limp as her head hits the pillow. Claire stifles her laughter. "Morgan, you might have to sit up a bit."  
Morgan groans in response, and opens her eyes just enough to jokingly glare at Claire. "No, it’s like 3am. I’m going to sleep," she shrugs weakly.

Claire chuckles. She grabs a pulse oximeter from the bedside table and places it on Morgan’s finger. "Heart rate 120," she murmurs.  
She slumps into on the chair next to the bed. As soon as she sits down, she realises how tired she actually is.  
"You look exhausted," Morgan mumbles through her own fatigue. "You should sleep too."  
Claire moves around in the chair, getting comfortable. Her vision starts to blur. She can’t fall asleep. She has to keep an eye on Morgan, make sure she’s okay. She can’t, she has to-

Claire wakes up to Lim standing over her. "Oh, hey," she sits up drowsily. Lim raises an eyebrow. "Why are you two here? Morgan feeling okay?"  
Claire sighs. "No, she’s not. It’s been getting worse. She’s been having trouble breathing."  
She looks over at Morgan’s lifeless form, curled up on the hospital bed.  
"... and staying conscious."  
"And you’re both positive for covid?"  
Claire nods. Lim takes a deep breath, trying to decide how to proceed. "Okay. I’m going to run a few tests and then we’ll take it from there, alright?"  
"Okay," Claire says, nodding again. 

Lim moves to the other side of the bed, pulling her stethoscope out from around her neck. She pulls down Morgan’s shirt slightly, pressing the resonator against the sick woman’s chest. "Abnormal breath sounds in the lungs. I think there’s possibly some fluid in there, but either way her condition is definitely severe."  
Audrey looks over at Claire. "Can you help me sit her up so I can listen to her lungs from the back?"  
"Yeah, sure," Claire replies, standing up slowly. 

Together they sit Morgan up, Claire holding her upright as Audrey lifts up her shirt and places the stethoscope on her back. After listening to the blonde doctor breathe for a few seconds, Audrey takes the stethoscope out of her ears, pulling Morgan’s shirt back down. Claire rests Morgan back on the bed, waiting anxiously as Audrey takes a deep breath.

"We’re going to get a CT to confirm, but I think there’s fluid in her lungs. It doesn’t sound good."  
Audrey gives Claire a sympathetic smile.  
"I’m sorry, I know you’re worried about her. I promise we are going to do the best we can for her."  
Audrey touches the other woman’s arm lightly. "Despite her flaws, we all care about Morgan, Claire. We really are going to do everything we can."  
"Thank you," Claire nods appreciatively, returning the small smile.

Audrey walks out of the room, and Claire’s gaze turns back to Morgan, who’s still unconscious.

As she watches Morgan breathing shallowly, a million thoughts are going through her mind. Morgan has to be okay. She has to.

Suddenly Claire starts to think about what would happen if Morgan wasn’t okay. If she didn’t get better.  
The panic starts to set in as she considers the possibility of Morgan dying. Hot tears drip down her face, and her heart speeds up. 

She can’t live without Morgan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its nearly the end of my summer holidays and my school starts back in three days so i might not post next weekend? i dont want to rush the next chapter like i rushed this one, especially since the next chapter is probably going to be important.  
> so if i miss an update i promise im not just neglecting this fic :D
> 
> that being said i might still post, im just warning u that im not sure if i will bc im going to be a bit busier.


	11. life or death (part one)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i missed last weeks update and on top of that this chapter is a day late :)  
> i will try post the next chapter next week but im not sure if it’ll be finished sorry eheheh but hopefully either next weekend or the week after

Nurse Villanueva comes in a few minutes later to take Morgan to CT, wearing full PPE.  
"Can I come with her? I can just wait outside until the scan’s done," Claire asks, reluctant to let Morgan out of her sight.  
"It’s better if you wait here. You know the drill for friends and family," Villanueva shrugs apologetically.  
Claire sighs, trying to think of an excuse. "I’m not just her friend though. I’m a doctor here too," she pleads, trying to keep the desperation out of her voice.

Villanueva opens her mouth like she’s about to say something, then closes it again. She exhales slowly.  
"I’m sorry, Claire. It’s against protocol. And right now, you’re not a doctor in this hospital. You’re off-duty because you’re sick, and you’re here because your..."  
She trails off, trying to find the right word.  
"... friend... is sick too."  
Claire sits down, defeated.  
Villanueva smiles regretfully. "Don’t worry. We’ll look after her."  
Claire gives her a small smile back. "Thanks."

She watches Morgan being wheeled away, trying to capture every detail about the way she looks right now, just in case it’s the last time she ever sees her alive.

"Stop being so dramatic, she’s going to be fine," Claire mutters to herself under her breath, after Morgan and Villanueva are around the corner and out of sight.

She doesn’t believe it though.

She had seen firsthand how this virus could turn on people in a second, and Morgan’s symptoms weren’t good. The fact that she had been unconscious for over an hour and wouldn’t wake up was a bad sign.

Claire unlocks her phone and scrolls up through her photos. She taps on one of her, Shaun, and Morgan after they had finished a fourteen hour surgery. 

They were removing a brain tumour that had also metastasised to the kidney and liver. They had had some close calls, but in the end the patient pulled through. They all went out afterwards, exhausted though they were, to celebrate. Andrews had taken the photo. 

In the picture, Claire and Morgan are sitting next to each other in a booth, Morgan in the corner, Claire in the middle, and Shaun on the end. Morgan and Claire are grinning, while Shaun is staring at the camera seriously. 

Claire doesn’t realise she’s crying until she sees a tear drip onto her phone screen.  
She misses when life was like this. Just her, Morgan, Park, and Shaun doing surgery and being residents, with Lim, Andrews, Glassman, and Melendez there to mentor them. 

Now they’re in the middle of a global pandemic. They can’t do elective surgeries or go out to bars to celebrate, Melendez is dead, Morgan will never be a surgeon, and she might die anyway.

All Claire wants is for things to go back to the way they were. All she wants is for Morgan to stay alive and be okay. 

She stays like that for who knows how long, staring at that photo on her phone as if trying to manifest it into being her reality again.

When Villanueva comes back, wheeling Morgan, who’s still unconscious, Claire is pacing up and down the room. "Doctor Browne," Villanueva calls, making Claire look up. She immediately rushes to Morgan’s side, checking she’s okay, she’s still here.  
"Is she okay? What did the scan show?"  
Claire asks Villanueva breathlessly. 

The nurse glances back towards the door, just as Lim walks in.  
"Doctor Lim should really tell you," Villanueva says, excusing herself from the room. 

Audrey walks forward, putting on a solemn expression that Claire knows all too well.

It’s the bad news face.

Claire’s done it herself many times, to break bad news to patients. She’s seen Morgan do it. She’s seen everyone do it at some point. 

"The scan showed fluid in Morgan’s lungs. We think she’s going into acute respiratory distress."

Claire feels her knees go weak and she backs into a chair, not trusting herself to stay standing. 

Lim keeps talking, but her voice is faint and far-away, as if Claire is fading away. "We’re reluctant to put her on a ventilator so we’re going to intubate and see if that helps her breathing."

Claire’s brain is moving in slow motion, trying to process everything she’s just heard. "She has acute respiratory distress syndrome, she repeats, dazed.

Audrey steps forward and puts her hand on Claire’s shoulder, giving her a sympathetic look. "I’m sorry, Claire. I wish the news were better."

Her pager goes off. "I have to go, I’ll be back when I can," she says quickly to Claire before running off to deal with probably another covid patient.

Claire sits down hard, stunned. Acute respiratory distress syndrome was often fatal, and if Morgan went on a ventilator (which wasn’t unlikely), statistics said she probably wouldn’t come off it.

She stands up slowly and walks over to Morgan’s bedside. She takes Morgan’s hand in hers, stroking along her hand with her thumb. Morgan’s fingers are cold and stiff, in contrast to Claire’s warm hands.  
"Please, Morgan," Claire murmurs, mostly to herself. "Please just wake up. I can’t lose you too. I need you."

Unsurprisingly, there’s no response from the unconscious woman.

"I’m sorry, Morgan, I’m so sorry."  
Tears are streaming down Claire’s face now.  
"There’s so many things I never said. I know we’ve had our differences, but I really want to be real friends."  
She sniffs.  
"And more," she whispers.

Her heart is hurting as she looks down at Morgan, alone and with the knowledge that their last conversation may have already happened.  
"Just stay alive. Please. I’ll do anything. I can’t lose you, I can’t-"

Her breath starts coming in gasps as the reality of the situation hits her. 

Over the sound of her own muffled sobs, she suddenly hears persistent and urgent beeping coming from the heart rate monitor.

The display reads 34 beats per minute. 28. 23. 16. 11.

"She’s coding!!" Claire screams out into the hallway. 

Nurse Villanueva races in, pushes the bed down flat, and pulls the pillow out from under Morgan’s head. Audrey runs in, just as Villanueva starts chest compressions. She pushes past Claire, who is still standing in the middle of the room, and speaks directly to Villanueva.

"She can’t breathe by herself anymore. Prep for a tracheotomy."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im excited for the next episode, the hacker storyline seems interesting!!  
> also there are probably quite a few medical inaccuracies here, sorry ab that.
> 
> anyways hope u enjoyed this chapter, tysm for all the nice comments i’ve gotten on this fic, and see u all next week (hopefully 😬)


	12. life and death (part two)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry im a day late with this chapter but i hope u enjoy :)

A nurse guides Claire out of the room. Claire can’t tell if it’s someone she knows, because the nurse is dressed in full PPE and she’s not focused enough to look closer. Even as she walks away from Morgan’s hospital room, the yelling and insistent beeping of the monitors follows her. Distantly, she hears Lim asking a nurse for a 10-blade.

She doesn't know how to process this. She doesn’t know how to deal with what might happen to Morgan. She sits down in the waiting room and looks around. 

Unlike normally, there are no friends or family members sitting around, waiting to hear about the patient they’re here for. Unlike normally, there aren’t any nurses sitting around at the nurses station, talking about the latest gossip. Unlike normally, the whole waiting room is empty. The only sign that proves Claire isn’t the only person left in the world is the beeping of monitors, and the yelling of doctors, and the hum of the elevator. Park and Shaun, both wearing masks, run down the hall and into a room where another doctor is calling something to them. They both pull on protective gowns and full-face helmets before pushing open the door. 

“Get a defibrillator, Shaun,” comes Park’s voice, with an urgent tone. 

“Clear!!” Claire hears Shaun shout a few seconds later.

Claire hears them shock the patient a few more times, before hearing Park murmur something that she’s not close enough to make out. The monitor stops beeping, and Claire guesses they must have called time of death and turned it off. 

The two men walk out of the room, Park looking defeated, Shaun looking only slightly more upset than usual. Claire puts on another mask overtop of the one she’s already wearing, stands up, and walks over to them.  
“Sorry about your patient.”

The pair glance up. Park’s eyes widen in surprise as he registers her presence. Claire can’t quite tell because of the mask, but she thinks Shaun looks happy to see her. “Hello Claire, what are you doing here?”  
Claire shrugs. “Morgan had to come in, so I’m here with her.”  
“Morgan had to come in?!”  
Park looks at her, worry written all over his face. Shaun looks concerned too.  
“Yeah.”  
“Is she okay? What happened?” Park frowns.  
“She was just… I don’t know, she was just having trouble breathing and then last night it got worse and she was clearly really sick and so we came in and saw Lim, and then she wouldn’t wake up, and they look her to CT and then-”

Claire stops, on the verge of tears. 

Park puts a hand on her shoulder. Sniffing, Claire gives him a weary smile.  
“What did the CT show?” Park asks gently. 

Claire wipes away a tear.  
“She has acute respiratory distress syndrome.”

She can see Park’s face fall beneath his mask. Shaun stares at her in disbelief. Claire takes a deep breath.  
“But I was in the room with her, and then she coded and Lim ran in and told Villanueva to prep for a trach and then I had to come here,” she says quickly before the lump in her throat stops her. 

“She coded?” Shaun’s voice is confused, disbelieving.  
“Yeah,” Claire whispers, hot tears finally spilling down her face. She looks up at Park, whos eyes are filling with tears.  
“We’ll wait with you,” Shaun decides, walking over to a chair and sitting down. Park and Claire sit down on either side of him. Tears silently make their way down Claire’s face, her hands shaking. She’s grateful for Shaun and Park’s comforting presence. She knows Morgan would be happy too if she could see them. Claire thinks maybe surgery isn’t the only thing Morgan misses about being in the surgical residency program. Neither Morgan, Shaun, or Claire are close to their families, and that team, the four of them, is important to them all. Claire doesn’t know what Park’s relationship with his parents is like, but judging by the fact that he’s divorced and his son and ex-wife live in another state, she’d guess that he feels the same. And he’s always been like a big brother to Morgan, even since they both worked for Coyle. 

When Lim finally walks in a few minutes later, she sees the three of them sitting there together, waiting to hear the verdict on their friend and colleague.

Claire looks up and tries to blink the tears out of her eyes so that she can see Audrey more clearly. She, Shaun, and Park all stand up, impatient to hear if Morgan is still alive. Audrey takes a breath and looks at them.  
“She’s stable.”  
“Thank god,” Claire’s arms are around Park, and Shaun looks like he’s grinning under his mask.  
“She’s alive,” Claire whispers, disbelieving.  
“She’s alive.” Park confirms, sounding relieved.  
Claire and Park separate and Claire looks at Lim.  
“So can we see her?”  
Lim shifts her weight onto her other foot, looking slightly unhappy.  
“You can, but- BUT-” she adds loudly, trying to get the three residents' attention back. “You might want to prepare yourselves first.”

Claire frowns and looks at Park, who looks just as confused as her.  
“Why?” She asks cautiously.

Claire thinks Lim seems slightly nervous as she inhales slowly.  
“We had to put her on a ventilator.”

“But ventilators can be harmful to patients. You are only supposed to use them when the patient’s condition is so bad ventilation is the only option left.”  
Shaun tells her.

Lim looks down. “I know, Shaun.”

Park still seems confused. “But how could it have been the only option? What do you mean?”  
Lim sighs. “Any other course of treatment wouldn’t have been enough. She won’t survive without a ventilator.”

“She probably won’t survive with a ventilator either.” The room is spinning in front of Claire’s eyes. She knew the long term effects of ventilation. She knew the statistics. It was unlikely that Morgan would make it out of this unscathed, if she even made it out at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry for the cliffhanger.  
> i wanted to have shaun and park in this chapter bc i really like the idea of the four of them being friends especially since none of them are close to their families.  
> also i really liked the recent episode (4x10). morgan was so nice to her patient and it was cute. i DID NOT like, however, when park touched morgans hand and when they hugged. i love this pairing as a brotp and as a friendship but i feel like the writers are going to get them together and i REALLY dont want them to. if we cant have breznick, and we cant have canon lesbian morgan, can we at least not have morgan and park as a couple :/
> 
> but yeah i hope u enjoyed this chapter and i really am sorry to leave u on kind of a cliffhanger. hopefully i finish the next chapter in time so u dont have to wait longer than a week :)


	13. ghost of you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again, sorry im a day late with this update. its pretty short and i lost motivation near the end so i wasnt really sure how to finish the chapter but anyways i hope u like it :)

Lim is leading them down the empty corridor. Claire’s eyes are swimming and her mind is wandering. She focuses on Shaun’s feet in front of her, following him closely. 

Suddenly Shaun’s footsteps stop, and Claire has to step back quickly so she doesn’t walk into him. She looks up to see Lim opening the door to the room she was in before Morgan coded.  
The moment Lim opens the door, Claire can tell something’s different from before. The room seems quieter, making it all too easy to hear the hum of the ventilator. 

Claire forces her eyes up to look at the patient, hoping to get the same happy feeling of comfort she usually gets when she’s with Morgan. 

But instead of comfortable happiness, this time she just feels shock and hopelessness. 

The woman on the bed is hooked up to machines, wires everywhere. She looks weak and pale. She doesn’t look like she’s even alive. She looks like a ghost already. Like she’s barely there, and could slip away at any time.

Claire doesn’t want to think of her as Morgan. Morgan, her charismatic colleague, who always has some smart retort on the tip of her tongue. Morgan, who, deep down, Claire knows is a good person, but sometimes has trouble showing it. Morgan, who has saved so many patients. Who even saved Claire after her mother died.

The woman in the bed isn’t Morgan. She’s barely a ghost of the person Morgan was. 

Is. Claire corrects herself. She’s not dead. 

Yet.

Claire still can’t stop herself from walking over and sitting down in the chair next to the bed. She reaches out for Morgan’s hand, which has an IV line sticking out of it.   
Morgan’s hand is cold, and when Claire feels for her pulse, just to convince herself she’s still there, it’s weak and erratic. 

Park and Shaun both sit by the window. Lim’s voice breaks through the silence.   
“If we see an improvement in her O2 sats, and if we think she’s getting closer to being able to breathe on her own, we’ll lower the vent settings and hopefully eventually take her off the ventilator all together.” 

“How likely is it that she won’t have any impairments if she comes off the ventilator?” Shaun asks. Lim starts to answer him but he keeps going.   
“The three things to worry about are impairments in physical function, cognitive function, and mental health. It can take months to recover even after she recovers from covid. If she does recover from covid.” Shaun states, matter-of-factly.

Lim nods. “I’m familiar with PICS, Shaun,” she says, somewhat sarcastically.   
“But to answer your question, the answer is I don't know. Impairments in physical and cognitive function are more common in older patients, and luckily Morgan is still pretty young. The most likely complication she might suffer once she comes off the vent is with her mental health, and that can be treated.”

“And how likely is it that she won’t come off the ventilator?” Claire’s voice cuts through the quiet.   
“Because 80% of covid patients on ventilators don’t. What if she’s not part of that other 20%?”

Lim looks around the room hesitantly, as if searching for the right answer.   
“Like I said before, Claire, she’s relatively young and doesn’t have any underlying conditions, so that's a plus. Given the circumstances, I think she definitely has more than a 20% chance of survival.”

Claire’s eyes are filling with tears, but she can’t stop herself from replying.  
“If we don’t see any improvements in her condition at all, how long before-” her voice breaks. She takes a deep breath, and wipes the tears now racing down her cheeks.  
“How long before you take her off the ventilator? If she shows no signs of improving, how long before she dies?”

Lim reaches out and puts a hand on her shoulder. “If she doesn’t improve at all in the next week, we’ll put her on ECMO.”

“Wouldn’t it be better to put her on ECMO now?” Shaun interrupts. “The longer she stays on a ventilator, the more likely she is to die. Ventilators can be very harmful. They can cause severe pneumonia. There have been much less reports of ECMO being harmful to covid patients.” He nods, satisfied with his report.

“Well, Shaun, we’re using ECMO in patients who are more vulnerable, so are very unlikely to come off a ventilator. We don’t have enough ECMO machines to use them on every patient who can’t breathe on their own. Morgan’s condition isn’t so bad yet that it would justify us using one of the ECMO machines on her, but like I said, if nothing improves, it would justify it.”  
Lim takes a breath.   
“Unless you have any more questions, I’ll leave you,” she says with a sympathetic smile. 

“Thank you,” Park gives her a small smile back.

The door clicks shut behind Lim, and the sound startles Claire. She gently rubs circles into Morgan’s hand, which she’s still holding. 

And then suddenly she feels Morgan squeeze her hand back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im looking forward to the next episode, the promo looked interesting so ya anyway hopefully i have another chapter ready in time for next week and i hope u enjoyed :D

**Author's Note:**

> ok so this is actually my first ever fanfic so it might not be very good? anyway stan breznick for clear skin and i hope u all enjoyed :)
> 
> also i will hopefully be updating this weekly so stay tuned for more.


End file.
